In 2021, ONS figures showed that 113,505 divorces were granted in England and Wales – an increase of 9.6% compared to 2020.
Census data released in 2023 also found that around half of all marriages will end in divorce.
With numbers increasing, more families are experiencing the effects of separation, which can be difficult.
Conflicts can be common throughout the process, due to not only the reasons for the separation itself, but also the division of assets, organisation of custody and childcare, and navigating the relationship between ex-partners after the separation has taken place.
To help you navigate this difficult time, here are four helpful ways you can separate your emotional response to the relationship break-up from the practical and legal considerations.
Seek legal advice
Seeking legal advice from a family solicitor is probably the first step you need to take upon deciding to separate from your partner.
The help of a family lawyer will help you make informed decisions and prevent conflicts from escalating.
Throughout the process, they will be on hand to answer questions you have about the process, and you can be certain that all aspects of the breakup will be performed in the most legally compliant manner possible.
Communicate
Maintaining open lines of communication with your partner can be difficult, especially if you have separated on negative turns, but being able to talk is an essential part of peaceful separations.
The more anger and conflict, the longer (and potentially more expensive) the process can be.
To communicate effectively, consider meeting in public places so your emotions are regulated. Think before you respond.
And don’t become angry if your partner doesn’t agree with you.
Lastly, keep an open mind: you’re almost certainly not going to agree on everything, but you will do well to put yourselves in each other’s shoes.
Think over the long term
Your mindset during the separation should be focused on the long-term well-being of all people involved.
If the outcome of the separation is mutually beneficial then conflict is more likely to be avoided.
Consider how your children and wider family will perceive you and your partner throughout and after the process too – keeping these in mind can increase the likelihood of you both keeping cool heads and doing what is best for everyone.
Be flexible
Being flexible and trying to compromise where possible is also essential as it shows willingness to negotiate on your part.
Even if your partner is not offering any concessions, giving them some of what they want can reduce tensions and open the door to a more amicable division of assets, childcare time – whatever matters to each of you.
What do you think is important to do during separations? Let us know in the comments what you think.
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